I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
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