Porn is love you can see.
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
