Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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