gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Send help, water and tortillas.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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