You really coming over, don't trick.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
