this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
