Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
