hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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