I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
