so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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