I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
