So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
They took my balls.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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