i just google imaged poop.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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