sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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