I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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