you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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