I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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