i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
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