He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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