I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize