we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
