where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
