did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I will die if light touches me.
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
