Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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