TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize
