I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize