Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize