There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize
