Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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