Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
