she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
So. Much. Porn.
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