I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
