I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
honey bunches of taint.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
NoShamevember. You game?
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize