I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
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