Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Randomize
