...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
