We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I currently don't understand fingers.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
