my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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