Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
