The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
pop tarts are not kleenex
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize