I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
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