I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Randomize
