Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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