wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
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He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
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I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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