Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Be still, my beating vagina.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
