I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize