I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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