I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
