why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize