I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
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