its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
