Just mADE A PArabola og urine
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Randomize
